How to make Muffins:

"MrPseudonym" (mrpseudonym)
11/19/2014 at 09:19 • Filed to: LOL ITS NOT A MUFFIN ITS AN ENGLISH MUFFIN SCR00BS

Start with muffin, then add toaster. Remove toaster when cooked, and butter. One may then, if it is a preflavored muffin, choose to not add jam. If it is a plain muffin, one may add other toppings, such as jam, eggs, sausage, etc. This is how to muffins.

EDIT: I love you oppo.

DISCUSSION (21)

spanfucker retire bitch > MrPseudonym
11/19/2014 at 09:22

LOL ITS NOT A MUFFIN ITS AN ENGLISH MUFFIN SCR00BS

I've always wondered, are they just called Muffins in England?

Leon711 > spanfucker retire bitch
11/19/2014 at 09:23

yes. and muffins are called muffins too.

thebigbossyboss > MrPseudonym
11/19/2014 at 09:23

fuck yeah. Man. I want a toaster in my life.

Nibby > MrPseudonym
11/19/2014 at 09:26

Kinja'd!!!

extraspecialbitter > MrPseudonym
11/19/2014 at 09:26

I read this, and I get the feeling that your muffin never moved from a single spot, but everything else did.

I want to believe this is true.

ttyymmnn > MrPseudonym
11/19/2014 at 09:27

Yes .

ttyymmnn > thebigbossyboss
11/19/2014 at 09:28

When I was in grad school, I was living in graduate student housing and we were not allowed to have a hotplate in the room. So I bought a toaster for $8 and survived on English muffins and peanut butter toast.

505Turbeaux > MrPseudonym
11/19/2014 at 09:29

I make my own english muffins. So damn easy and good. THAT is how you muffin son

Ingredients

1 cup milk

2 tablespoons white sugar

1 (.25 ounce) package active dry yeast

1 cup warm water (110 degrees F/45 degrees C)

1/4 cup melted shortening

6 cups all-purpose flour

1 teaspoon salt

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Warm the milk in a small saucepan until it bubbles, then remove from heat. Mix in the sugar, stirring until dissolved. Let cool until lukewarm. In a small bowl, dissolve yeast in warm water. Let stand until creamy, about 10 minutes.

In a large bowl, combine the milk, yeast mixture, shortening and 3 cups flour. Beat until smooth. Add salt and rest of flour, or enough to make a soft dough. Knead. Place in greased bowl, cover, and let rise.

Punch down. Roll out to about 1/2 inch thick. Cut rounds with biscuit cutter, drinking glass, or empty tuna can. Sprinkle waxed paper with cornmeal and set the rounds on this to rise. Dust tops of muffins with cornmeal also. Cover and let rise 1/2 hour.

Heat greased griddle. Cook muffins on griddle about 10 minutes on each side on medium heat.

Follow directions in this post